What’s App groups are great. Especially the ones that are formed within a building society or a residential area as you get so much useful local information that you’d otherwise spend hours hunting down. They are also great because aside from the daily jokes, you also end up having some seriously funny conversations.
I am part of such a group within the Parsi colony where I reside and we had a hilarious conversation yesterday about the bizarre myths we all heard when we all were new mothers at one point or another. It was so comforting to know that I wasn’t the only one who rolled their eyes when hearing these crazy theories and by the end of the day we were having a contest trying to see who had come across the weirdest one. So without further ado, here goes:
Close your ears and completely wrap up or you will bloat
I understand that post birth your body has gone through a trauma and you need to stay cozy and rest up. But, how does closing your ears and being wrapped in warm clothes from top to bottom prevent bloating? Sure, you may be more susceptible to an infection what with the sleepless nights and all but surely by bundling yourself up in layers galore and keeping the fan and AC closed you may just pass out from the heat? I pity the mom who gave birth in the Mumbai heat and was then forced to heed this advice. New moms, yes do take care of yourself and avoid going out for the first 40 days but not because you will bloat up like a balloon but instead because you need to rest up!
Keep wearing a sanitary napkin for a year or your uterus will bloat
Baby aside, one of the biggest perks of pregnancy and motherhood has to be the fact that you don’t get a period for 15 odd months of your life. Now imagine stealing this perk and forcing the poor mom to wear a sanitary napkin for a year whether she is bleeding or not! I am secretly sure a man who has never worn a pad a day in his life came up with this one. Yes, once you give birth you’re going to bleed like no one’s business and its good hygiene to wear a pad but it makes NO sense to keep wearing one if you don’t have a period. If the logic in this is that you keep your private parts covered so that air doesn’t go inside your uterus, surely your underwear can do that job?
Rub husbands undies on your stretch marks
I can’t take credit for this one. I read about this tip when doing some more research for this post and wondered if I should laugh or go into a rage. Apparently, if you rub your husbands’ underwear on your stretch marks that they will magically disappear. I don’t know on how many levels this is wrong. Is my underwear not good enough to be rubbed on myself? Did the person who came up with this have any idea about a thing called hygiene? And, lets not even get into the fact that stretch marks are a lovely reminder of the miracle your body just made to bring your little one into the world or the fact that stretch marks don’t disappear no matter what you do but rather just fade away into your skin tone.
You must keep your breast covered when feeding your child to prevent your nazar
I will eventually get around to writing what I truly feel about covering up when breastfeeding but for now lets just address the impracticality of this. Most new mom fantasies end at giving birth and I didn’t have a clue how to breastfeed or making my baby latch on. Being able to see whats going on with my baby while I feed him is the first step towards me making sure my child is well-fed. Moreover research suggests that the mom-child bond strengthens when mom and baby look at each other during breastfeeding. Why would my child get the “evil eye” from me looking at him lovingly? In fact it feels more weird covering up – especially in my own home – as I then feel like some strange object is chomping away at my boobs.
If you don’t wrap your baby they will be bow-legged
So all the kids not from India are running around the world bow-legged? I will agree that swaddling a baby is crucial. The first three months of your baby being born is often referred to as the fourth tri-mester simply because your baby is so unprepared for the big bad world. Baby M loved being swaddled at night and even now at four months sleeps in a sleep sack. But, the difference is that I did it to settle him and comfort him to bed rather than to straighten out his legs! Its also important that baby gets time out of his swaddle to exercise his legs and learn new skills like rolling or simple raising his legs. So, new moms please do swaddle your baby but do it for the right reasons!