Becoming pregnant is a joyous thing. But the moment you share this happy news with your near, dear and faraway ones, be prepared for the flood-gates of advice that is sure to flow your way. From what to eat to how much (or little) you sleep to when you should buy things for your baby – others will have more to say about your pregnancy than you ever thought possible.
Recognising that good intentions are behind all this advice that comes your way will certainly help towards keeping your temper in check when yet one more person tells you that, “When I was pregnant, I did blah, blah, blah..” However, I wish people would understand that the hormone roller-coaster is at full speed inside a pregnant mum’s body and that there are some things one should just not say, no matter how well you know them or how good your intentions are!
1. Don’t tell anyone you are pregnant or you will have a miscarriage
Well, I told you and nothing has happened to the baby yet, has it? This superstitious thinking, so deep rooted within Indian families really puts a damper on what should be the happiest time of your life. In this era of a gazillion ultrasounds and tests the mother has enough to worry about and whatever is going to happen, will. Being pregnant is an intensely personal experience and whether you want to shout it from the mountain tops or go to Paris and give birth secretly, the decision is entirely yours. Telling someone you are pregnant WILL NOT cause you to have a miscarriage but such negative thinking will surely impact your health.
2. You’ve become so fat!
Since I was already plump (that’s putting it kindly) before I became pregnant, for most of my pregnancy I had no discernible baby bump. So, I was very proud when finally in my 7th month my tummy began to show. However, this was immediately offset when random strangers or people I hadn’t met in years told me I had become fat. Here’s a revelation. We already know. Between worrying about eating right and staving off almost constant hunger all while having the energy of a sloth, being told we are fat is the last thing we need.
3. Sleep as much as you can now itself
I was lucky to have no sickness whatsoever throughout my pregnancy. However, I felt incredibly tired in my first and third trimester’s. Since I am a total home-body I loved this so called ‘side-effect’ and took full advantage. However no mom-to-be wants to hear that her ninth month is the last time she will get to sleep. We have all read the articles about crying babies and functioning on zero sleep and that’s scary enough. Hearing friends tell me that I now only have x more days of sleep always made me feel like a time bomb was ticking under my pillow and put me right off my so called beauty sleep.
4. Labour is the most painful thing you will go through
“Really? Thanks for letting me know. No, I hadn’t spent most of the last 9 months imagining how an entire human being is going to come out of a tiny hole in my body. So, hearing you say this has made such a difference in my life.”…said no pregnant woman ever.
5. Don’t get an epidural
I found it funny that the same people who told me how labour was the most painful thing ever also told me to not get an epidural. Their warnings were not based on any scientific fact but on hearsay about women who became paralyzed or other such scary stories. It’s almost as if feeling unbearable pain is a rite of passage and if you aren’t tough enough to bear it then you can’t possibly be a good mom. The reality is that each woman has a completely different type of labour and pain threshold. And, no matter what birth plan you have, you may change your mind when you are actually in labour. The only person you should listen to in this regard is your body and your doctor.
What crazy things did people tell you when you were pregnant? Do share in the comments below!